Microaggression — Ready a Response.

 Good article in the New York Times today about how to respond to micro aggressions. Here are some observations from that article:


  • For many of us, microaggressions are so commonplace that it seems impossible to tackle them one at a time. Psychologists often compare them to death by a thousand cuts.

  • The first step to addressing a microaggression is to recognize that one has occurred and dissect what message it may be sending.

  • Discrimination — no matter how subtle — has consequences.

  • Even once you have decided that you can respond to a microaggression, knowing what to say or how to behave can be nerve-racking.

  • While your response will vary by situation, context and relationship, one recommendation is to memorize one tactic from a list of prepared statements. For example, ask for more clarification.  

  • Learning to draw boundaries and find support among allies is one of the most important steps in dealing with microaggressions.

My suggestion — In confronting microaggressions,remember it is the aggressor that has the problem, not you. Be prepared with a response beforehand. Unfortunately, some (many?) micro aggressors are serial aggressors. Just be prepared when you meet this person again. It’s not going to change, unfortunately.


“Microaggressions: Death by a Thousand Cuts.” New York Times (June 15, 2020).

Controlling Stress — 7 Suggestions.

Good piece in the New York Times today giving 7 suggestions on how to control your emotions during this time of stress.. “When Small Things Become Insurmountable.” Seems pretty simple but they are good suggestions.

 1. Breathe

  • As clichéd as it sounds, stopping to take a breath can snap you out of your mood. When you are feeling your worst, stop and take two minutes to inhale and exhale deeply. 

2. Apologize

  • If your blowup involved another person, simply apologize.
    And after apologizing, 

3. Exercise

  •  A single bout of exercise can boost positive feelings for a few hours afterward. 

4. Tackle a challenge

  • Sometimes you just need a distraction. A hard puzzle or game can be the perfect antidote.

5. Find a way to connect

  •  Most of us feel starved for that contact right now. Call a friend, do a video chat, or even just sit on your fire escape and wave at the person in the next building over.

6. But skip the punching bag or scream session

  • Venting your anger may actually make you feel worse. 

7. Find what you’re thankful for

  • A lot of things in the world are bad right now, but figuring out what you’re thankful for can help you bounce back.
    Expressing gratitude for the people or things in our lives “can help us feel more connected and inspired to help others.”